It is a common misconception that you must be an interesting person to get people to like you. It is also thought that in order to be popular and have a recognizable name (a Name Brand), you must be able to capture the attention of a crowd, obtain and share knowledge, and be able to inspire others to act.
While these are all great qualities to have, making connections and leaving lasting impressions ultimately rely on more than being interesting. It all comes down to your ability to make the other person feel special and make them feel that you REALLY GET THEM.
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No one is more interested in you than YOU are.
That’s right. There is no one in this world who finds you as interesting as you do. You love to tell people what you can do. It’s human nature. But imagine for one moment that you meet someone just as intersted in you as you are! You would say, “That’s an intersting person. I think I’m great, and so does this person. Wow! I think this person is REALLY on to something here.”
When building your personal brand, it’s very important not to lose sight of that idea. Often when I’m helping a person define his or her own brand, I find there to be a tendency to focus only on personal skills and stories. (read: be interesting)
While this is all important, it is certainly not everything. Having a great Name Brand means creating lasting impressions. When you are first meeting someone, it is Social Poison not to take an interest in that person! While having great stories to tell can create interest, it can also distract from the objective:
Creating a Name Brand that people are not only interested in, but one that they want to have a stake in.
14 responses so far ↓
Modite - Engagement for the next generation // August 5, 2007 at 4:04 am
[...] don’t care about your opinion anyway. They care about their own opinions. They care about themselves first and moving their own agenda forward. Your agenda can be the leader of the pack. You start by [...]
Tiffany Monhollon // August 6, 2007 at 3:44 pm
Great advice, Adam. Many people forget the power of listening in building relationships. And your relationships with someone will directly impact the power of your personal brand on them – in fact, your relationship with them will filter all your other efforts.
Say less, influence more. « Little Red Suit // August 6, 2007 at 4:48 pm
[...] Listen. Then, when it’s your turn to say something, you’ll know what they want to hear. And you can deliver a message they care about. Become interesting by being interested. [...]
Now, Make me feel important! « Creating Your Name Brand // August 9, 2007 at 8:51 am
[...] the best and most effective way to get your goals accomplished is to make other people feel heard and feel sincerely appreciated. What better way to be remarkable and word-of-mouth friendly than [...]
Yahoo column: Tips for building your personal brand » Brazen Careerist by Penelope Trunk // September 20, 2007 at 9:46 am
[...] Adam Salamon writes that there are some things you should always want to convey, for example that you’re interested in other people and that you have a positive attitude. These are things everyone should think [...]
krsnakhandelwal // September 22, 2007 at 4:19 am
And if try to become interesting for some body and also be interested , you have love flowing between the two.
krsnakhandelwal // September 22, 2007 at 4:20 am
And if try to become interesting for some body and also be interested , you have love flowing between the two.
Charisma–Foundation for your Brand « Creating Your Name Brand // September 23, 2007 at 11:33 pm
[...] that people learn after having a certain amount of social exposure. It’s the ability to listen, laugh, and make people feel comfortable with your presence. That of course starts with being [...]
The Bases of Advocacy « Creating Your Name Brand // October 18, 2007 at 11:58 pm
[...] is simply getting people to like you. We learned that getting people to like you starts when you take an interest in the other person. It also takes a charismatic personality that makes people feel good. [...]
Comments 441- 680+: 34 Links from Successful and Outstanding Bloggers - Liz Strauss at Successful Blog - Thinking, writing, business ideas . . . You’re only a stranger once. // November 1, 2007 at 11:39 am
[...] Adam Salamon Don’t Be Interesting, Be Interested! [...]
Thiru // November 2, 2007 at 4:08 am
well said – people especially the ones you meet for the first time never know about you. It is better to demonstrate that you are an interesting person straight away!
“Everybody Markets” « Creating Your Name Brand // December 7, 2007 at 12:31 am
[...] playing with your phone when you should be paying attention, and my other post about the power of listening. Seth Godin points out that no matter what you’re doing, you’re always being perceived [...]
Rob // December 11, 2007 at 2:56 pm
This reminds me of a story told by Jim Collins when discussing his book Good to Great. He said he discovered his main idea for the book when his mentor told him to stop trying to be so interesting and to start getting interested. Life is much more fun when I can remember this little bit of wisdom!
Being a Smooth Operator | Personal Branding Blog - Dan Schawbel // February 14, 2009 at 6:17 am
[...] people’s goals and motives are and understand how to play to those needs. Do they need to be heard? Do they need to feel wanted or [...]